Hannah has had a cold for the past 3 days. Just a runny nose and congestion, but it definitely affects her when she is sleeping. She has times when she snores for a bit. But then there are times, like right now, when she is incredibly quiet that I can’t even hear her breath. (And yes, she is still sleeping in the pack’n’play next to my bed…I haven’t made that move yet to her crib. I’m working on it.)
Knowing that sleep apnea is one of the symptoms of her disease, I have been incredibly paranoid that she may have it. I have kept myself awake until almost 3 AM for the past few nights, not intentionally, only because I’ve become obsessed with listening to make sure she is breathing and that she doesn’t have sleep apnea. I can’t tell you how many times I hear silence, and I get up to put my hand on her chest to feel her breathing. Sometimes I swear I don’t, but it is so late at night, I feel like my paranoia and exhaustion is wracking my brain. I admit, I’m not proud of this.
Angelcare Monitor
Today, we went to Babies R Us, and we bought one of those SIDS breathing monitors for the pack’n’play. You know, the one where if it doesn’t feel any movement in 20 seconds it sets off an alarm. It is the Angel Care Movement Sensor. We tested it out tonight since it requires a “firm surface”, and it works great (we layed it on a thin hardback book).
I’m sitting here with the little triangle monitor about a foot away from my head on my nightstand. Hannah is about three feet away from me. She was snoring a bit earlier, but she is incredibly quiet right now to the point that I can’t hear her breathing at all. I’m looking over at the little monitor light, and I see the top light, the one that flickers every 3 seconds to show that it feels movement.
Since I see the light flashing, I’m not getting up to check on her.
I hate, hate, hate this paranoia I have fed into because of this disease! I was NEVER that type of parent before!
It is like I know that sleep apnea is probably going to be coming soon, and I want it to stay away as long as I can because I know the sooner we get the “next symptom,” the quicker this disease is progressing. The longer we can keep the next symptom from appearing, the slower this disease will progress, hopefully.
But I need to sleep. Hopefully this monitor 1 foot from my bed, keeping tabs on my daughter 3 feet from my bed (yes, I know, it is almost ridiculous – if someone told me about another parent who did this, I would have thought overly-paranoid freak as well) will put my mind at ease for now about this.
I have to keep reminding myself, she has an old-fashioned runny nose and congestion. Just like a normal baby.
Oh well, tomorrow is another Cerezyme treatment, so I’ll be spending the day at the hospital again.
Latest Comments